time went by and I couldn't sleep...

Sunday, February 24th

I am so sleepy... the afternoon grogginess is slowly spreading to every limb of my body as I lay in bed. So, so sleepy now. I cuddle up between my blankets and realize I am writing a poem in my head. Poetry about being sleepy and wanting to dream. (sigh).. but sleep doesn't come. My mind is awake, and my imagination is on a buzz. I can't hush it. I start thinking of all the things I need to do before I go. I imagine folding things in piles, squeezing things into tight spaces in my duffle bag. I imagine the scale on which the duffle bag will sit. I imagine numbers, BIG numbers.. and then I repack in my mind. Less books? Less shoes? Less.. less.. less.. until there is nothing left. I pack almost nothing and think I will buy everything in Morocco! Then I scratch the idea and start all over again. I imagine jetlag and many, many people.. and then the call to prayer chiming out of the minorettes. People talk to me and I stare with a small helpless smile. I am wishing I could understand and I know that if it goes on ANY longer I will answer the call to prayer and ask instantly for the gift of toungues!.. You see, I cannot hush it. I say "ssshhh- imagination, sleep". "Sleep by my side and I will give you a gift when we wake up, I will maybe even let you paint!".. But she is so rebellious... and continues. So I don't sleep, I laugh instead and think: "thank GOD for my sense of humor- it will save me from many lonelinesses". I think about what a nice sunny day it is and how the sun is going down later, how I am having the sensation that it's warm outside and that I should go out. But I remember with a pang that it isn't warm at all. It is virtual sunshine. I watch the sky and smile because she has her as company.. I understand what friendship is. But theeeen.. I remember my sleepiness. I decided to share my "imaginings"- sleep can wait, once more.